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Heaton: 15 Sure Signs You Went to High School in the South
Personally, I would decline a do-over for high school. It was tough: The confusion of emerging adulthood, and all those tragedies that only a whole lot of time could mellow into comedy. Here are some of the sure signs you went to high school in the South.
1. You’ve been in several homecoming parades through town. I had my first car accident in one.
2. You had a part-time job at Mc Donald’s, a feed store or mowed yards. Nothing was worse than waiting on your girlfriend and her friends.
3. Bonfires were for big games, camping trips, or just because some builders carelessly left some wood on site.
4. You had a tree-house fort that you still used for….err…contraband.
5. The urge to “roll” a yard could break out at any time – not just on Halloween. I helped my friends roll my own yard once.
6. You’ve found creative ways to visit a Sonic: in a costume or on a horse, tractor or golf-cart.
7. You’d done the “Chinese Fire-drill” in the middle of town.
8. In winter, any snow or ice on the road meant “snow day.”
9. The whole town went to football games, often in decorated cars.
10. The local paper always had sports recaps – often the water tower did too.
11. The only thing you ever said to the police was “Yes Sir”, “No Sir”, and or “My folks are doing fine. Thank you for asking.”
12. Tornado drills were fun. Tornado warnings were not.
13. Cruising through town with a carload of friends was the best way to spend an afternoon.
14. You had so much Faulkner in class you thought you would never want to read again. Now you have dog-eared copies of The Sound and the Fury, As I Lay Dying, or Absalom, Absalom!
15. You’ve been on a field trips to the same places so often you can close your eyes and be there today. Around Memphis, this was Chickasaw Village and The Pink Palace.
You know…maybe I would go back — for just a little while.
Tim Heaton is a HottyToddy.com contributor and can be reached at tim.h.heaton@gmail.com. His new book, “Momma n’ Em Said: The Treasury of Southern Sayings” is available on Amazon.
| Sat, Aug 31 |  | vs Furman | W, 76-0 |
| Sat, Sep 7 |  | vs Middle Tennessee | W, 52-3 |
| Sat, Sep 14 |  | @ Wake Forest | W, 40-6 |
| Sat, Sep 21 |  | vs Georgia Southern | W, 52-13 |
| Sat, Sep 28 |  | vs Kentucky | L, 20-17 |
| Sat, Oct 5 |  | @ South Carolina | W, 27-3 |
| Sat, Oct 12 |  | vs LSU | L, 29-26 (2 OT) |
| Sat, Oct 26 |  | vs Oklahoma | W, 26-14 |
| Sat, Nov 2 |  | @ Arkansas | W, 63-35 |
| Sat, Nov 16 |  | vs Georgia | W, 28-10 |
| Sat, Nov 23 |  | @ Florida | L, 24-17 |
| Sat, Nov 30 |  | vs Mississippi State | W, 26-14 |
Eva Youngblood
April 23, 2015 at 7:09 pm
I was born in Oxford grew up there went to school there (K–7th grade)lived on University Ave & N.14th St my mother worked at Ole Miss my 1st cousin( Mary Ivy ) worked in Dean’s office until late ninety’s,,,,,,I love OLE MISS the REBELS & OXFORD MS The list above is right on target….
Karen fowler
April 24, 2015 at 9:00 am
This list is dead on! I would say it’s like we went to the same high school, but we did. Great job of summing it up for the rest of the world.
Mike Little
April 24, 2015 at 11:45 am
Yelp, nailed it! Born in Jackson but grew up in the big city of Star. Been to the Vicksburg Battle Field and the Water Ways Experiment Station on so many field trips I ought to be a tour guide!