Great question — and a timely one for anyone new to Mississippi. Here are seven recommendations I’d offer transplants trying to ingratiate themselves with Mississippians, rooted in cultural observation, not cliché:
1. Learn the Language of Small Talk
Don’t underestimate pleasantries. “How’s your mama?” isn’t just chatter — it’s a relationship test. Be generous with time, eye contact, and stories. A five-minute chat about the weather or barbecue can go further than an hour-long résumé.
2. Respect the Role of Church, Even if You’re Not Religious
Whether or not you attend, understand that church is social glue here. It’s where relationships form, trust is built, and community work happens. Be curious and gracious — you don’t have to join a choir, but don’t be surprised if you’re invited to a potluck before a business meeting.
3. Be Present at Local Events
Attend high school football games, charity suppers, fall festivals, or even the county fair. People notice when you show up — and they notice when you don’t. These events aren’t just for fun; they’re how Mississippians build social capital.
4. Ask About Their People
In Mississippi, who your people are still matters. Ask about someone’s hometown, family, or church and listen closely. If they say, “You might know my cousin Jimbo who works down at the co-op”, follow the thread — that’s how networks open up.
5. Learn a Few Local Foods and Preferences
Whether it’s knowing that “barbecue” means pork, not burgers — or how they pronounce “pecan” — food is part of the code. Show genuine interest in the local way of doing things, and maybe even develop an opinion on slaw.
6. Don’t Over-Sell Where You Came From
Mentioning you’re from New York or California is fine. Leading with it too often can backfire. Mississippians are proudly local and often suspicious of anyone trying to “fix” them. Be humble. Share where you’re from, but show you’re here to learn, not lecture.
7. Be Patient — Relationships Take Time
Mississippi isn’t about instant acceptance. It’s about consistency. If you keep showing up, doing what you say you will, and taking time to know people personally, you’ll find that this “club” will slowly but surely open its doors.
Not bad!
Tim Heaton is a HottyToddy.com contributor and can be reached at tim.h.heaton@gmail.com.
His book, “Bless Your Heart, You Freakin’ Idiot: Southern Sayings Translated” can be found on here on Amazon: https://a.co/d/fQ4SouZ
