Southernism of the Week:
Three Sheets to the Wind: Same as “Tight as a tick on a lazy dog” or “can’t lie down without holding on” or “pie-eyed” or “hammered” or “loaded” or “walking on a slant.” … In other words, that fella’s been “feeding his face with bar glasses” to the point of heavy intoxication. Definitely the opposite of Pat Boone when he wakes up (clear-eyed).
HAPPY HAPPY HOLIDAY BEVERAGES
It’s time to ring in 2015 with a cup of good cheer and toasts among friends. Here are three alcoholic classics to prepare just in time for all those New Year’s Eve and Peach Bowl parties.
My Killer Eggnog puts a different spin on the genre while maintaining a smooth but not-so-subtle kick. Jack’s Frosted Punch is tasty for special occasions year round, and the Hotty Toddy Mulled Cider will warm your innards during the coldest days of winter.
Be sure to designate a sober companion for the drive home.
HOTTY TODDY, Y’all, and Happy New Year!
JACK’S FROSTED PUNCH
For a non-alcoholic version, substitute 2 liters of ginger instead of champagne and a pint of raspberry sherbet for the Chambord.
2-3/4 c of cranberry juice cocktail
3/4 c lemon juice
1 c white granulated sugar
2 to 3 bottles of chilled champagne
1 c Chambord raspberry liqueur
Lemon slices
Combine cranberry cocktail, lemon juice and sugar, blending well. Freeze in a bundt cake pan or in a ring mold such as the type used for molding congealed salads.
Place frozen cocktail ring into a punch bowl 30 minutes before company arrives. Add chilled champagne and Chambord. Garnish with lemon slices. Serve at once. YIELD: 24 cups.
HOTTY TODDY MULLED CIDER
1 gal fresh apple cider
1 tsp whole allspice
2 sticks cinnamon
2 to 3 whole cloves
1/4 c lemon juice
2 T orange juice
¼ c light brown sugar, optional
Rum to taste
Simmer the cider, allspice, cinnamon, and cloves for 20 minutes. Whisk in the lemon juice and orange juice.
Continue to simmer until ready to serve, adding brown sugar if the cider is not sweet enough. Strain and serve while still hot, topped with rum to taste. YIELD: 10 servings.
LAURIE’S KILLER (To Hell With Cholesterol) EGGNOG
I developed this many years ago due to my distaste for bourbon. The original version is featured in the December 2014 issue of Delta Magazine. This cooked-yolk custard was the result of not being able to obtain pasteurized eggs this year. Feel free to adjust the alcoholic content downward and the whipped cream content upward.
12 pasteurized or locally sourced fresh eggs
1 lb (16 oz) confectioner’s sugar
1-1/2 quarts whole milk
1/2 qt (2 c) heavy whipping cream
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1 c dark rum
1 c B&B Brandy
1-to-2 c Kahlua
Half pt of whipping cream
1/2 c confectioner’s sugar
Separate the egg yolks and egg whites, careful not to allow any yolk into the whites. Cover the egg whites and refrigerate. Beat the 12 egg yolks on high speed in stand mixer until light and fluffy. Gradually beat in 2 cups of confectioner’s sugar.
Heat milk and first cream in a 4-quart saucepan just to the boil point (scalded). Remove immediately from heat when edges begin to bubble. Stir in the nutmeg.
Resume beating the egg mixture on medium-low speed and with mixer beating, slowly add about a half-cup of the scalded milk through a narrow funnel, to temper the eggs. Turn mixer to high speed and carefully and slowly add remaining hot milk through the funnel in a steady stream. Continue beating for about a minute.
Pour hot egg mixture back into the saucepan (may have to use a larger pan which has been preheated with hot water (removed and pan wiped dry). Heat egg mixture to about 160˚F, stirring gently and continuously with a spoon until the custard is thick enough to coat the spoon. It won’t take long.
Pour mixture into a container and place the container in an ice bath (a larger bowl of crushed or cubed ice). After chilling for about 3 minutes, beat in the B&B, rum and Kahlua until completely blended. Place container on ice and store in fridge for at least an hour to cool. About an hour before time to serve the eggnog, place the custard mixture in freezer for about 30 minutes. Beat egg whites to soft peaks.
Remove custard from freezer. Fold in the egg whites and beat on low with hand mixer.
Whip the half pint of cream with remaining sugar. Carefully fold this into the nog until blended. Serve immediately or chill in fridge until ready to serve, stirring first with large spoon.
Laurie Triplette is a writer, historian, and accredited appraiser of fine arts, dedicated to preserving Southern culture and foodways. Author of the award-winning community family cookbook GIMME SOME SUGAR, DARLIN’, and editor of ZEBRA TALES (Tailgating Recipes from the Ladies of the NFLRA), Triplette is a member of the Association of Food Journalists (AFJ),Southern Foodways Alliance (SFA) and the Southern Food and Beverage Museum (SOFAB). Check out the GIMME SOME SUGAR, DARLIN’ web site and follow Laurie’s food adventures on Facebook and Twitter (@LaurieTriplette).
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